There are three levels of hungry people: the salad eaters, who push around some rocket and tomato on their plate until they’re out of fetta, the meal finishers, who can get through a decent steak and the sweet potato fries, and then there’s the ones filling their pockets with extra wafer biscuits and jelly beans at the buffet, because soup and potato skins didn’t do it for you. Number three, this one’s for you.
You’re the one that orders all three courses, twice. You’re the one eating off everyone else’s plates when they’re done. When we try and eat 100 chicken wings of our own accord it’s considered gluttony, but if someone else puts up the challenge and you accept, well, then, you’re a legend. We’ve got good news for you, because there are plenty of places in Brisbane putting up epic food challenges just waiting for your ever-raging hanger. So put your stretchy pants on, arm yourself with yoghurt and plain milk, and prepare for Brisbane’s best food challenges.
Gypsy’s Wagon | Gaythorne
Start your challenge repertoire with something a little tamer. Like taming the world’ssecond hottestchilli. Grab a hunk of this burning love from Gypsy’s Wagon and order the ‘Trinidad scorpion wings’ with chilli, bhutjolokia peppers (that’s that record breaking chilli), and orange habanero. Best order a milkshake too.
Chur Burger | Fortitude Valley
When Chur Burger asks you how many you can do, they’re not talking about your squat best. How many deliciously beefy, pickle clad, cheese covered patties can you do on your Chur Burger? We’re not even talking ‘pounders’ anymore, because the Chur Burger challenge is way over the pound, boasting a current record of 11 patties on one beautiful bun.
Yardbird Ale House | Fortitude Valley & Paddington
Wings, wings, and more wings. For the delicious party legs that they are, they sure do pack a challenge when teamed with a fiery sauce. Yardbird’s Death Sentence wings challenge is so hot it has it’s own surcharge. You might meet your maker, but at least you’ll die with a full belly!
Slice | West End
The people who said less is more had obviously never tried pizza before. Slice Pizza in West End offer a ‘mega pizza,’ boasting a massive 36 slices in four different scrumptious flavoured quarters. Which means you still get nine slices of the toppings of your choosing, without having to sacrifice your love of vegetarian or chorizo. You also get a free food baby. Surprise!
Texas Wild Wings | Springwood
Heating up the ‘burbs, Texas Wild Wings brings us a challenge that you have to be over 18 to enter. If you thought you had tasted spicy wings, think again – you have to wear gloves, they’re that spicy. If you can eat five wings in five minutes without consuming any other food or drinks (and without having a projectile moment, you know the one), then you win a $100 return restaurant voucher, a Texas Wild Wings t-shirt and a picture on the wall of fame. Totes worth it.
Longboards Eatery & Bar | Surfers Paradise
A bit of a hike from the city, but totally worth the drive, Longboard’s Phat Bastard challenge is nothing less than a whopping 1.8kg burger. It’s as appealing as it sounds, layered full of deliciousness with meat, salads, bacon, cheese, onion rings and sauces. The only downfall ruining the relationship between you and this beauty is that you’re timed to demolish her. Get comfortable, because you’re in for the longest hour of your life.
Curryville | Morningside
Forget mild butter chicken, Curryville’s chicken hai-hai is level suicidal. You might want to clear your calendar for the day after if you plan to try this one, because it’s guaranteed you won’t be leaving the house. It even comes with it’s own safety kit. You have been warned.
Bayside Kebabs & Fish ‘n’ Chips | Clontarf
Ever polished off a kebab, or even two, at 3am and been left wanting more? You won’t be hungry after Bayside Kebabs’ monster 50cm bad boy, which wraps flat bread around a kilo of meat for one epically carnivorous challenge. A kebab never sounded so good.
Ready, set, food challenge.
Words by Lucille Burkitt
